Sunday, November 18, 2012

Just Kitten...

Want to hear a cat joke?
Just kitten. 

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A man wrote this...
I was visiting my daughter and son-in-law last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper.
“This is the 21st century, old man,” he said.
“We don’t waste money on newspapers. Here, you can borrow my iPad.”
Let me tell you, that fly never knew what hit it….
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Why does a lobster not like to share?
Because they’re shellfish.
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What do you call a nosy pepper? 
JALAPENO BUSINESS!
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What did the three legged dog say when he walked into the bar?
 “I’m looking for the man that shot my paw.”
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How do you make a goldfish age?

Take out the “g”.
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I called SeaWorld yesterday to see if I could get my sister a Shamu Fan Club Sweatshirt.
They said my call may be recorded for training porpoises.
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What do you call a male cow who is taking a nap?
A BULL DOZER.
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What do you call an alligator wearing a vest?
An investigator!
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A guy goes to the doctor and he has a carrot in his nose and celery in his ear.
He says, “Doctor, I don’t feel too well.”
And the doctor says, “Well, I can see you haven’t been eating right.”
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