Sam and I got married 36 years ago June 17, so I guess it IS "Marriage Month" for us, and many more couples.
I've been to bridal showers where advice was sought on 'what-advice-would-you-give-newlyweds?'
First, I would say, "Don't let familiarity breed contempt."
Contempt is disdain.
In marriage one gets to know his/her spouse intimately,
which means more than just sexually, of course.
One gets to know one's everything.
Marriage was daunting to me.
Well, Sam would see me without my makeup.
And in my monthly yuck.
And in my 'realness'.
I mean, I couldn't hide behind a facade every single minute.
And that was the wonderful thing about Sam:
I knew I could be myself with him....
and he with me...
Those pictures were taken a few years ago...
and they tell a lot.
Sam and I are comfortable with each other.
I'm so glad I prayed for my 'future spouse'
and didn't settled for just anyone,
just to be 'married'.
Oh, we've had our disagreements.
We've not always seen eye-to-eye.
But we've made the commitment to love each other,
no matter our mushy -albeit fleeting- 'feelings of love'.
WE. ARE. FAMILY.
So first I'd say, (at bridal showers),
"Don't let familiarity breed contempt."
Second, I would say, "Just let your spouse BE."
You just want to BE, right?
So does everyone.
Especially your spouse.
DON'T TRY TO CHANGE ANYONE,
ESPECIALLY YOUR SPOUSE
Happy Marriage Month!