Monday, July 25, 2016

Monday Funday


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Patient: Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I'm a dog.
Doctor: Lie down on the couch and I'll examine you.
Patient: I can't, I'm not allowed on the furniture.

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“Poor Old fool,” thought the gentleman as he watched an old man trying to fish in a puddle of water outside of the bar. He decided to invite the old man inside for a drink. As they sipped their whiskeys, the gentleman thought he’d humor the old man and asked, “So how many have you caught so far?”

The old man replied, “You’re the eighth today.”


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Teacher: Johnny, where were you born?
Little Johnny: Los Angeles
Teacher: Which part?
Little Johnny: What do you mean which part? The whole body was born in Los Angeles.

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TEACHER: Joey, how do you spell 'crocodile'?
Joey: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong.
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you did ask me how I spelled it."

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Marathon runners with bad footwear suffer from the agony of defeat.

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"I'm sorry," said the clerk in flower shop, "we don't have potted geraniums. Could you use African violets instead?"
Replied the customer sadly, "No, it was geraniums my wife told me to water while she was gone.”

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I hope that made you smile on this Monday.









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